air in my head

It can be a simple smell

No adjectives today; it is neither fragrant nor pungent, it’s just there, floating in my head.

A stimulus, a speck of a memory, connected to this wave of smell. I can sense the deja vu of this feeling, its source eludes me. Repetitive and for the usual reason, I think this feeling must have something to do with you.

You, the one that is not the only thought in my head. The one that does not sit next to me today.

I can not reach you in this physical world, easily found behind my gaze. Cacophony of voices, sighs and shrugs. Maybe in this overtly palpable world, you will get lost. Maybe, it doesn’t even matter. The air from earlier enters my head again, I inhale it deeply, but the fragments are scarce. I think he knows. I am conscious of his presence.

This feeling must be seamless, unconsciously felt. Today I force it. Tomorrow it will come more naturally.

~ 12:13pm, 04/10/12